Thursday, June 21, 2007

Whatever's! Road Show Award

Welcome to the century's first and last Road Show Award, celebrating everything irritating on the road. Enjoy yourself to the fullest and take the accolades, display it proudly.

And we begin the Award show!

93.5 RED FM Show stopper award- Goes to MTC buses for blocking the way for other vehicle at the traffic signal...they will stand and block the road in a lane, they won't drive in.

Bonkers serial honkers award- Is shared by over 1 million people, who are in the habit of honking their vehicles for others to move out, knowing there is no way out, or at traffic signals.

Stevie Wonder Colour blind award- Is shared by over 3 million people who speed up on seeing red signal...making traffic in the other lane wait for 5-6 seconds. Also goes to a million people who jump the red signal if the traffic in the other end isn't "heavy"

India Post Snail Award- Goes to all the cyclists, for driving in the middle of the road and not giving any 'opportunity' for other vehicles to overtake. The corners of the road is conveniently left for people to loadshed the 'waterfall'

Hutch-Airtel Blah-blah award- Goes to all the people who talk while riding...slowly and crappily. If they stop their vehicke and talk they'll be 'Obeying the Law', which they don't wanna do. Such people are the ultimate nuisance on the road, coz they don't even let you overtake.

Aviva 'Delayed decisions' Award- Goes to all the bikers who don't apply breaks in time due to multiple reasons, such as sight-seeing 'chicks'. On an event, when the front vehicle stops suddenly, they'll go and dash with their number-plate.

Whirlpool Fast Freeze Award- Goes to some walkers. They would choose the most inappropriate time to cross the road, and when see a vehicle speeding towards them...they'll neither move ahead or backward...they'll freeze in their place. Also they never move out of your way when you are honking behind them.

Agarwal Packers and Movers Award- Goes to all the people who carry 5 people in their 2- wheeler. The pillion riders are somehow packed in the two wheeler, kids are just hanged somewhere and they'll move. Such people are a nuisance coz they lose their balance while driving and ofcourse grab a lot of surface area.

91.7 BIG FM Award- Goes to all BIG trucks who 'must' travel only at 9 a.m, making the traffic move so slooooow

Oxford Dictionary Foul mouth Award- These drivers are a walking dictionary of bad words...cursing everyone they lay their eyes on...in loud voice. They irritate everyone on the road.

Pond's Anti Ageing Award- Goes to all drivers who being their grandfathers 4-wheelers on the road. Not only they are noisy, they are slow and often break down during peak hours in the middle of a narrow-junction.

WILLS Smoky Award- Due to popular demand the Award has two categories. The award is shared between people who smoke on the roads, irritating the non-smokers
and people whose vehicle gives away smoke like a chimney, choking the other people on the road.

PETA 'Save the buffalo' Award- Goes to all drivers with a buffalo sized nayi naveli chamchamaati gaadi, but don't have quarter the talent to drive it. The vehicle's so big that there's no space to overtake and their driving talents are so bad, that you're stuck behind them driving at 30 kmph.

And last, but not the least(definitely)

BOSE headphones Award- For everyone who drives a vehicle with a noise which even a deaf can hear. People fitting this category will be given innumerable BOSE headphones, which they can gift to other drivers for tolerating the noise.

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